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2008-07-31

What Happens to a Dream Deferred?  


A little girl with warm brown eyes that sparkle with her smile
She's the smallest in her class
But she remains undeterred
Her eyes reflect hope and the
Promise that her future holds great things
She can be whatever she wants to be
That's what she was told
And that's what she believed.
Time passed and the little girl
Grew into a young lady
Her eyes still maintained that reflection of hope and the
Promise that her future held great things
Dreams of being a lawyer, a pediatrician, and
Finally settling on an engineer.
This dream became a reality
But what happens to the dreams of love?
The promise of a prince charming?
The love like in the movies?
What happens when this young woman looks around
And there is no knight in shining armour?
Dreams of a husband, a house, 2.5 kids...
These dreams are deferred.
So do the deferred dreams dry up like
Raisins in the sun?
Nah...I'm too determined to let that happen
These dreams are tucked away in a safe place
And called upon every night
To bring a smile and continue the hope and the
Promise that tomorrow brings another day
Filled with endless possibilities...
She's come too far
I've come too far
To let my dream dry up like a raisin in the sun
So Mr. Hughes, the answer is no...they don't dry up
At least not mine.
If we allow our dreams to dry up
That means we're losing hope and sight of a
Future that holds endless promises.
Remain complacent, I cannot.
Trudge on is what I do.
One day at a time
One step at a time
One dream at a time
Until I reach my dream
Then the beginning of a
New dream
Begins.

2008-07-25

Friday Randomness  

It's Friday!! YESS!!!!! I made it through another week, thank God. A friend told me that I needed to update my blog, and then another friend updated hers...inspiring me to come up with some random musings of my own ;-)

Sadness or confusion usually inspires me to blog...it helps clear my head and provides me with peace and sanity. So when things are peachy, as they often are, then it's difficult for me to draw inspiration. My wonderful friend also made an excellent point that sometimes maybe I don't blog about things because there's so much going on...that I don't want to write it down. People just may not get
it.

Random Rundown

  1. I love my boyfriend...he's my love drug. Often times I blog about the diffucult thoughts I have and not the wonderful times we have. So let me say that sometimes I don't give him enough credit (on this blog) for the wonderful man that he is. The man that I love, the man who makes me smile, the man who makes my soul smile, the man who makes my toes curl, the man who makes my heart sing, the man who can laugh and it brings peace to my soul...I could go on and on, but I won't...I'll just say that he's very special and when I close my eyes and imagine him, I get tingles and this warm feeling that runs straight up and down the inside of my body...yeah that's a love drug.
  2. So if you start a relationship with someone by breaking up an existing one, does that mean the relationship is bound to fail or does that just make it that much more difficult? I find it very difficult to accept the fact that people can break up happy/unhappy homes, regardless they're still homes, and think that God is going to smile upon that. What gives you the right or the audacity to stroll into someone else's relationship and break it up? Why are you waiting in the wings, talking to someone else's man/woman behind their back and then when the relationship fails (big surprise since you placed yourself there by any means necessary) you happily step right into the place of the previous woman/man. Yeah I guess his/her previous relationship did fail...but that's because you stayed right up in the middle instead of leaving well enough alone...then you try to perpetrate as a friend...PUH-LEASE you aren't fooling anyone, not even yourself.
  3. Black in America: to me, the black men was the best. It saddened me for a moment to see 2/3 of the children of a black family with white women. It really did...then I asked myself do I have an issue with interracial marriage...and the answer is no. I'm not sure why it didn't sit well with me, perhaps because they portrayed all of the successful black people with white friends or white husbands/wives...and there are plenty that have successful black friends/husbands/wives as well. Those weren't shown. Then I had to remind myself that it's a reality in our culture to have successful black men date white women or for majority of our children to be born to single mothers. Just because it's not a reality for me, doesn't mean it does not occur. A lot of time was spent examining the issues, but not the solutions. At the end of the day it leaves you wondering...why are we where we are and what can we do to move forward from here? I think some time should have been spent exploring that aspect. And WHY were ALL the black men interviewed either with white friends/women and successful, in jail, or not taking care of their kids??? What about the successful black couple??? Where were they??? I realize that this may not be a majority but it exists...it's my family and about 70% of my friends' families as well. All successful black men don't chose white women and have white friends. Simply not true. Some of them may and that's their right, but I couldn't find my boyfriend or my male friends in the special...where are these wonderful young brothers? Why didn't CNN pause to give them a moment to shine?
  4. When you're young and you look young...why do some people in the corporate world think they can run all over you? No, I'm not a secretary. No, I'm not your secretary. No, I will not do your grunt work. No, I will not go to endless meetings with you just because it makes you feel important to be in repetitive meetings. This is why we need a shorter work week or telecommuting...so I don't SMACK somebody. lol. Some people just pluck my nerves to NO END! But I guess that's life and that's work and I could be unemployed. So I'll smile and be polite, I won't smack anyone...but I certainly won't be pushed around either.

2008-07-07

Mister L  




When I hear you voice
My soul smiles
This is where I was meant to be
My entire life

When you laugh, it's contagious
And I find myself
Caught up
In minutes
We're both laughing
Our heads off at God knows what

You have this way of squeezing my knee
And kind of a double-eyed blink
That signals to me
I love you

When it gets bad
I can't walk away
Like there's an invisible rope binding us
You're my Love Drug
When we're not speaking
I find it hard to function
Found myself praying every minute of the day
Just to get by and save my sanity
The smallest things make me soo happy
When I'm with you
The way you laugh
Kind of deep and smooth
Relaxes my soul

Even when I'm talking a mile
A minute
And I know you're
Not listening, And you just go
"mmm-hmm" or "yep"
I love you for pretending

When I fell in love with you
I didn't have a choice
But to stay loving you
That is what I choose to do
That is a commitment on my behalf
A commitment
That you have also made to me
And through this commitment
I believe we have truly come to
Love.

I see your faults
And I love you anyway
I recognize your growth
And I love you for it
You see my faults
And you love me anyway
You recognize my growth
And you love me for it

I love you for all that you are
And all that you will be
I love us
You are my
Love Drug



2008-07-03

my prayer  



in the midst of praying for someone else, God showed me that i should pray for me first and foremost.

be the best me that i can be

then He'll take care of the rest

seek Him first and all other things shall be added unto me

quit trying to remove the speck out of his eye and worry about the log in my own

and this is my prayer...


God give me the grace to seek understanding instead of trying to be understood

God give me the wisdom to always look at myself first before i criticize him

God give me a spirit of contentment, the wisdom to know which battles are worth fighting

God give me peace in the middle of the storm, always remembered to look to You for my joy

God give me humbleness and the willingness to learn

God give me the ability to understand the difference between my perception and reality

God give me wisdom like Esther to know when to speak

God give me that help meet ability like Eve

God give me a spirit of submissiveness like Sarah

God give me genuine humility, a spirit of meekness like Ruth

God give me a man of God who will love me as Christ loved the church

God give me a man after Your own heart

God give me the ability to discern the things i can change and change them

God give me the wisdom to discern the things i cannot change and accept them

God help me...to be a better christian, woman, friend, daughter, sister, and girlfriend